WITHDRAWAL SYMPTOMS

At last, I am finally home. Home as in my apartment. After almost 2 months of working rigorously on the Silver Book project, I am going back to my old routine—wake up at 8am, walk to the office, check my email, work till 6pm, go to a household prayer meeting, be home by 12 midnight, go to bed… and the cycle continues. Like clockwork.

But one day out of the project and I begin to feel disoriented. Having been cooped up for more than a month, I suddenly feel that the world is too big and all I want to do is retreat to a little corner, away from everyone else. Maybe that’s what isolation can do to someone. But then again, as I think about it more and more, I realize it’s something else—I miss everything that happened in those one month and a half of being quartered in Mapayapa Village.

Yes, that’s what it is! It’s not so much of being isolated, but the moments within that period of isolation. Aside from the back-breaking work (which is truly unforgettable), what I long for most are the laughter, the meals, parts of our lives which we shared along the way, the lovable cats and their love triangle (it’s the story of Chestnut against another male cat named Heidi fighting over the only female house cat Yuki, which I promise to tell next time), the pounds and inches incurred, the round-the-clock work… Sigh! I think I’m gonna cry.

Even though we began to get into each others’ nerves towards the last few days, I cannot deny the fact that I miss everything that happened within that one month and a half. It’s like having a family all of a sudden. In an instant, I had three “mommies”, one daddy, three younger sisters, and three pets!

I gained friends who I believe will remain my friends for a long, long time. Through the stories we shared, I acquired fresh insights. Through the genuine love that went around our little group, I believe my heart grew further, making it capable of loving others more. With each idea exchanged, my skills were enhanced. With each word of encouragement, my confidence increased. With each correction, I am humbled.

I heard from someone that anything you do repeatedly for a period of 30 days becomes a habit. What went on during the completion of the Silver Book is definitely a habit that would be very difficult to break, but it could be done. After all, the end of one venture ensures the beginning of a new one. But the memories built during those 30 days or so would definitely be hard to erase from my heart.

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